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Forgiveness is an Essential Element in Every Marriage.

How Many Times Should We Forgive?


In God’s Word the first part of Genesis 2:24 says “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife.” This scripture represents two keys to our marriage relationship – leaving and cleaving. An essential element to our ability to leave and cleave in our marriages is our willingness to forgive.  Without forgiveness, oneness in marriage is impossible.  

Some say that forgiveness is a feeling.  True forgiveness is a choice.  We should be kind, tenderhearted – compassionate, and  forgiving – giving freely and graciously as a gift.  Ephesians 4:32 says “And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ has forgiven you.”

The 4 Steps to Forgiveness:

1)    Choose with your free will to forgive

2)    Make the promise to lift the burden of guilt from the person as far as the wrong against you is concerned.

3)    Seal it with your behavior. 

4)    Trust God to allow you to forget and renew your mind with some new attitudes

        a.    Avoid being historical & hysterical.

        b.    You are what you think about daily.

        c.    Don’t wait on your feelings.



How many times should we forgive? In Matthew 18:22 it says "Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven."   


If you choose not to forgive:

1)    You will turn to bitterness.     

2)    You become crippled in the living of life.

        -     Another definition of “depression” is anger turned inward.

3)    There will be no way to walk in personal fellowship with God.    

        -     Mathew 6: 14-15 You cannot be in fellowship with God if you are carrying a grudge.

        -     Satan never wants you to forgive anyone.

        -     If you don’t forgive – the enemy will take advantage of your un-forgiveness. 

        -     Let someone know they are forgiven.



1)    In marriage, make a habit of forgiving and never keep count.

2)    Settle it quickly.

3)    Remember, forgiveness always includes the possibility of restoration and a new start.

4)    Forgiveness takes 1, but reconciliation takes 2 - A couple cannot walk in unity when one chooses not to forgive.

5)    How many times should we forgive? 70 Times 7

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